According to Eniola Akinkuotu
A former Senior Special Assistant to ex-President Goodluck Jonathan on Media and Publicity, Dr. Doyin Okupe, says he visited ex-President Olusegun Obasanjo, kissed and prostrated before him on Sunday.
Okupe said this in a Facebook post on Friday.
Okupe, who once served under Obasanjo said their relationship turned sour after he began working for Jonathan.
Okupe said, “Last sunday , in the company of some friends I met with Baba Obasanjo principally to try and settle and resolve the misunderstanding that has existed between baba and I since I joined the Jonathan administration.
“Vintage baba, he descended on me heavily and vented his anger copiously. I prostrated and held his feet as a well trained Yoruba man and pleaded earnestly for his forgiveness, occasionally given short explanations for areas I considered my actions were misunderstood.
“Also typical of baba, ever willing to forgive a repentant son, we embraced; I even kissed him as a loving son.
“Politics sometimes is such a bad business, you hurt your friends and even benefactors, but all is well that ends well.”
It will be recalled that during the build-up to the last presidential election, Obasanjo had openly criticised Jonathan.
He alleged that Jonathan had recruited a team of snipers and also said Jonathan was afraid that the then presidential candidate of the All Progressives Congress, Muhammadu Buhari, would jail him if he won.
Obasanjo had also torn his membership card of the Peoples Democratic Party which attracted condemnation from Jonathan’s men
Okupe had openly condemned Obasanjo in the process of defending Jonathan.
Punch
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Saturday 14 May 2016
Friday 13 May 2016
EFCC gets order to hold Fani-Kayode for 14 days
The Economic and Financial Crimes Commission has obtained a remand order to keep a former Minister of Aviation, Chief Femi Fani-Kayode, in custody for the next two weeks.
The remand order is, however, renewable after 14 days depending on the outcome of investigations.
Fani-Kayode is being investigated by the EFCC for allegedly receiving N840m when he was the Director of Publicity for the Goodluck Jonathan Campaign Organisation in 2015.
The money, which Fani-Kayode confessed to receiving, was said to have emanated from the account of the Central Bank of Nigeria.
The commission had recently frozen the ex-minister’s Zenith Bank account with number 1004735721 domiciled at Maitama, Abuja.
Fani-Kayode had told our correspondent that the PDP leadership gave him the impression that the money was sourced from private individuals.
He said, “I served as the director of publicity of the Jonathan campaign organisation and I was told to set up an account for the directorate, which I did. I never received money from the CBN but like all the other directors, we received money from the director of finance.”
However, a detective told our correspondent that the EFCC was working on the assumption that the ex-minister might have received more than N840m.
The source said, “Besides the N840m that Fani-Kayode admitted to receiving, we believe he got more. Thanks to BVN (Bank Verification Number), we can trace all other accounts that he has. We will trace the transaction history and see how much he truly received and how much was from the public funds.
“There are other petitions against the former minister and he will be grilled. In the coming days, we will reveal the outcome of investigations.”
When asked if the investigation of the former minister was a witch-hunt as alleged, the detective said such excuses were not tenable in court.
He recalled that Fani-Kayode was arraigned in court for several offences between 2008 and 2015, noting that this was under the PDP administrations.
“The issue of a witch-hunt does not apply here. Fani-Kayode faced a criminal trial under (late President Umaru) Yar’Adua and (former President Goodluck) Jonathan. Did it mean they also hated him?” the detective said.
Meanwhile, it was learnt that the commission might seize some of the ex-minister’s properties as investigations continue.
“Section 29 permits the assets of a person arrested under Section 28 to be seized by the state. The Recovery of Public Property Special Provisions Act Cap R42004 Laws of the Federation also empowers the EFCC to seize assets,” the source added.
Punch
The remand order is, however, renewable after 14 days depending on the outcome of investigations.
Fani-Kayode is being investigated by the EFCC for allegedly receiving N840m when he was the Director of Publicity for the Goodluck Jonathan Campaign Organisation in 2015.
The money, which Fani-Kayode confessed to receiving, was said to have emanated from the account of the Central Bank of Nigeria.
The commission had recently frozen the ex-minister’s Zenith Bank account with number 1004735721 domiciled at Maitama, Abuja.
Fani-Kayode had told our correspondent that the PDP leadership gave him the impression that the money was sourced from private individuals.
He said, “I served as the director of publicity of the Jonathan campaign organisation and I was told to set up an account for the directorate, which I did. I never received money from the CBN but like all the other directors, we received money from the director of finance.”
However, a detective told our correspondent that the EFCC was working on the assumption that the ex-minister might have received more than N840m.
The source said, “Besides the N840m that Fani-Kayode admitted to receiving, we believe he got more. Thanks to BVN (Bank Verification Number), we can trace all other accounts that he has. We will trace the transaction history and see how much he truly received and how much was from the public funds.
“There are other petitions against the former minister and he will be grilled. In the coming days, we will reveal the outcome of investigations.”
When asked if the investigation of the former minister was a witch-hunt as alleged, the detective said such excuses were not tenable in court.
He recalled that Fani-Kayode was arraigned in court for several offences between 2008 and 2015, noting that this was under the PDP administrations.
“The issue of a witch-hunt does not apply here. Fani-Kayode faced a criminal trial under (late President Umaru) Yar’Adua and (former President Goodluck) Jonathan. Did it mean they also hated him?” the detective said.
Meanwhile, it was learnt that the commission might seize some of the ex-minister’s properties as investigations continue.
“Section 29 permits the assets of a person arrested under Section 28 to be seized by the state. The Recovery of Public Property Special Provisions Act Cap R42004 Laws of the Federation also empowers the EFCC to seize assets,” the source added.
Punch
US Moves to Block Buhari From Receiving Abacha's Loot
The Unites States Congress may soon vote on a bill that will allow President Barack Obama and his government keep all of Abacha's loot recovered in the U.S.
Sani Abacha.jpg
PREMIUM TIMES reports that the if the vote is passed, the loot will be held in trust by the US government for victims of boko haram insurgency.
The bill tagged H.R. 528 was sponsored by Congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee who represents the 18th District of Texas. Speaking on Wednesday (May 11) at a Congressional subcommittee hearing on the U.S. role in helping Nigeria confront Boko Haram and other threats in Northern Nigeria, Ms. Jackson Lee sought the Committee’s support for H.R. 528.
Sani Abacha.jpg
PREMIUM TIMES reports that the if the vote is passed, the loot will be held in trust by the US government for victims of boko haram insurgency.
The bill tagged H.R. 528 was sponsored by Congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee who represents the 18th District of Texas. Speaking on Wednesday (May 11) at a Congressional subcommittee hearing on the U.S. role in helping Nigeria confront Boko Haram and other threats in Northern Nigeria, Ms. Jackson Lee sought the Committee’s support for H.R. 528.
Thursday 12 May 2016
Fuel Scarcity: FG Releases Statement As Official Price Will Now be N145/Litre
The federal government today, announced the removal of petrol subsidy an pegged the official rate at N145/per Litre.
Below is the press statement released by the Minister of State for Petroleum, Dr. Ibe Kachikwu
“We have just finished a meeting of various stakeholders presided over by His Excellency, the Vice President of the Federal Republic of Nigeria.
The meeting had in attendance the Leadership of the Senate, House of Representatives, Governors Forum, and Labour Unions (NLC, TUC, NUPENG, and PENGASSAN).
nnpckachikwu.jpg
The meeting reviewed:
1. The current fuel scarcity and supply difficulties in the country.
2. The exorbitant prices being paid by Nigerians for the product. These prices range on the average from N150 to N250 per litre currently.
3. The meeting also noted that the main reason for the current problem is the inability of importers of petroleum products to source foreign exchange at the official rate due to the massive decline of foreign exchange earnings of the federal government. As a result, private marketers have been unable to meet their approximate 50% portion of total national supply of PMS.
Following a detailed presentation by the Honorable Minister of State for Petroleum Resources, it has now become obvious that the only option and course of action now open to the government is to take the following decisions:
1. In order to increase and stabilise the supply of the product, any Nigerian entity is now free to import the product, subject to existing quality specifications and other guidelines issued by Regulatory Agencies.
2. All Oil Marketers will be allowed to import PMS on the basis of FOREX procured from secondary sources and accordingly PPPRA template will reflect this in the pricing of the product.
Pursuant to this, PPPRA has informed me that it will be announcing a new price band effective today, 11th May, 2016 and that the new price for PMS will not be above N145 per litre.
We expect that this new policy will lead to improved supply and competition and eventually drive down pump prices, as we have experienced with diesel. In addition, this will also lead to increased product availability and encourage investments in refineries and other parts of the downstream sector. It will also prevent diversion of petroleum products and set a stable environment for the downstream sector in Nigeria.
We share the pains of Nigerians but, as we have constantly said, the inherited difficulties of the past and the challenges of the current times imply that we must take difficult decisions on these sorts of critical national issues. Along with this decision, the federal government has in the 2016 budget made an unprecedented social protection provision to cushion the current challenges.
We believe in the long term, that improved supply and competition will drive down prices.
The DPR and PPPRA have been mandated to ensure strict regulatory compliance including dealing decisively with anyone involved in hoarding petroleum products".
- HONOURABLE MINISTER OF STATE FOR PETROLEUM RESOURCES
Below is the press statement released by the Minister of State for Petroleum, Dr. Ibe Kachikwu
“We have just finished a meeting of various stakeholders presided over by His Excellency, the Vice President of the Federal Republic of Nigeria.
The meeting had in attendance the Leadership of the Senate, House of Representatives, Governors Forum, and Labour Unions (NLC, TUC, NUPENG, and PENGASSAN).
nnpckachikwu.jpg
The meeting reviewed:
1. The current fuel scarcity and supply difficulties in the country.
2. The exorbitant prices being paid by Nigerians for the product. These prices range on the average from N150 to N250 per litre currently.
3. The meeting also noted that the main reason for the current problem is the inability of importers of petroleum products to source foreign exchange at the official rate due to the massive decline of foreign exchange earnings of the federal government. As a result, private marketers have been unable to meet their approximate 50% portion of total national supply of PMS.
Following a detailed presentation by the Honorable Minister of State for Petroleum Resources, it has now become obvious that the only option and course of action now open to the government is to take the following decisions:
1. In order to increase and stabilise the supply of the product, any Nigerian entity is now free to import the product, subject to existing quality specifications and other guidelines issued by Regulatory Agencies.
2. All Oil Marketers will be allowed to import PMS on the basis of FOREX procured from secondary sources and accordingly PPPRA template will reflect this in the pricing of the product.
Pursuant to this, PPPRA has informed me that it will be announcing a new price band effective today, 11th May, 2016 and that the new price for PMS will not be above N145 per litre.
We expect that this new policy will lead to improved supply and competition and eventually drive down pump prices, as we have experienced with diesel. In addition, this will also lead to increased product availability and encourage investments in refineries and other parts of the downstream sector. It will also prevent diversion of petroleum products and set a stable environment for the downstream sector in Nigeria.
We share the pains of Nigerians but, as we have constantly said, the inherited difficulties of the past and the challenges of the current times imply that we must take difficult decisions on these sorts of critical national issues. Along with this decision, the federal government has in the 2016 budget made an unprecedented social protection provision to cushion the current challenges.
We believe in the long term, that improved supply and competition will drive down prices.
The DPR and PPPRA have been mandated to ensure strict regulatory compliance including dealing decisively with anyone involved in hoarding petroleum products".
- HONOURABLE MINISTER OF STATE FOR PETROLEUM RESOURCES
Wednesday 11 May 2016
Egbeda murder: Deceased’s alleged lover absconds
Managing Director of a publishing firm in Ikeja and alleged lover of late Mrs. Ronke Shonde, who was allegedly beaten to death by her husband at their Egbeda home in Lagos, last week, has reportedly been absent from work since Monday, following his indictment as the cause of the quarrel that led to the tragedy. A visit to the office located on the ground floor of a two-storey building on Talabi Street, Ikeja, yesterday, revealed that the publishing firm’s MD was absent. Members of staff of the company kept mum when approached, saying that they were not in the best position to speak. Besides, the late Ronke’s husband, Lekan Shonde, who was interrogated by detectives at the Homicide section of the State Criminal Intelligence and Investigation Department, yesterday, still maintained that his late wife had a secret relationship with her boss. He had earlier stated that he over-heard a telephone conversation between his late wife and her boss, (names withheld) where she allegedly recalled their love escapades, adding that his late wife never contradicted the claim.
Read more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2016/05/egbeda-murder-deceaseds-alleged-lover-absconds/
Read more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2016/05/egbeda-murder-deceaseds-alleged-lover-absconds/
Tuesday 10 May 2016
Buhari Has a Medieval Mindset Says Pat Utomi
Pat Utomi, Professor of political economy and management expert has again lashed out at President Muhammadu Buhari.
Pat Utomi.jpg
Speaking at a Breakfast Meeting organised by the Redeemed Christian Church of God (RCCG), Victory Chapel, Province 21, Magodo, Lagos State, Utomi said, the president was not getting the best because of his idea of “exclusion rather than inclusion” ; SUN NEWS reports.
''The problem with Buhari’s administration is his medieval mindset. He excludes rather than includes. So, he does not get the best idea. He is insular. I don’t push him in this conversation but I am sure that if I put my friend, the vice president under pressure, he will admit what I am saying. Because of their medieval mindset, they have created a country that is more divided than they met it. And that is a problem for leadership that is marching towards progress.”
When asked how long Nigerians might wait for the change they voted for, he said: “Everything is based on context. Take a look at the mismanagement of this fuel thing; the whole idea is nonsensical.
“It doesn’t have to go on like this; you are punishing Nigerian people unnecessarily. The sufferings that Nigerians have endured in the last couple of weeks over this petrol crisis have reduced productivity. If you throw it open to people across the world to bring petrol to Nigeria and sell at any price, you will discover that within a year, the price of petrol will be lower than the government’s fixed price today.
“You (Buhari) set up a committee called transition committee. It suggested that you deregulate the whole thing about crude oil, but no, you won’t. Your ideas go back 30 years and they are irrelevant to this world. Open up your mind and listen to people and you can make progress. To lead is to serve.
“To lead, you must be knowledgeable. People don’t follow somebody who doesn’t know where he is going. Otherwise, you fall into a ditch.”
nigerianbulletin
Pat Utomi.jpg
Speaking at a Breakfast Meeting organised by the Redeemed Christian Church of God (RCCG), Victory Chapel, Province 21, Magodo, Lagos State, Utomi said, the president was not getting the best because of his idea of “exclusion rather than inclusion” ; SUN NEWS reports.
''The problem with Buhari’s administration is his medieval mindset. He excludes rather than includes. So, he does not get the best idea. He is insular. I don’t push him in this conversation but I am sure that if I put my friend, the vice president under pressure, he will admit what I am saying. Because of their medieval mindset, they have created a country that is more divided than they met it. And that is a problem for leadership that is marching towards progress.”
When asked how long Nigerians might wait for the change they voted for, he said: “Everything is based on context. Take a look at the mismanagement of this fuel thing; the whole idea is nonsensical.
“It doesn’t have to go on like this; you are punishing Nigerian people unnecessarily. The sufferings that Nigerians have endured in the last couple of weeks over this petrol crisis have reduced productivity. If you throw it open to people across the world to bring petrol to Nigeria and sell at any price, you will discover that within a year, the price of petrol will be lower than the government’s fixed price today.
“You (Buhari) set up a committee called transition committee. It suggested that you deregulate the whole thing about crude oil, but no, you won’t. Your ideas go back 30 years and they are irrelevant to this world. Open up your mind and listen to people and you can make progress. To lead is to serve.
“To lead, you must be knowledgeable. People don’t follow somebody who doesn’t know where he is going. Otherwise, you fall into a ditch.”
nigerianbulletin
Monday 9 May 2016
6 Facts That Prove That Women Are The Main Cause Of Domestic Violence
*A man who beats a woman is a beast and do not deserve to live with humans but with fellow beasts in the jungle...No matter how provoked you may be as a man,please never raise your hand to beat your wife.*
It is no longer news that many women have lost their lives through domestic violence and the more we try to put the blames on the menfolk the more we will continue to blind our eyes to the fact that indeed,many women are the cause of the domestic violence we see today because they fail to understand some important aspects of how most men are naturally wired and below are 6 facts that point to this...
1.Negligence: Yes this is one fact many ladies will not deny because there is no accidental character and the signs of a violent man would have been there . It is quite amazing that many ladies get beaten up by a guy they are dating and this guy will still go ahead and become their hubby and i keep wondering what these ladies were thinking saying i do to a guy who beats you up. Many ladies usually believe such guys will change but the honest truth is that a guy who beats you up while dating you may kill you when he becomes your hubby.RUN.
2.Sophistication:Many people will wonder what this has to do with domestic violence but it has a whole lot to do with it. Sophistication is the bane of today's woman and the number one reason why many ladies find it hard to get a man to settle down with. Many ladies are too sophisticated to come to terms with the fact that they are married,they still want to live a life of a spinster while married and these set of ladies will not hesitate to tell their hubby the need for him to help out in the kitchen,the need for him to cook his food and even take care of the baby and subconsciously, these ladies gradually bruise the ego of the man who may continue to stomach these things until he gets pushed to the wall and reacts in a violent way. No matter how highly placed or sophisticated you may be as a lady,please understand that you are a wife and a mother and you must learn how to joggle these roles without turning your hubby into a domestic servant...if he decides to help out please let it be his decision.
3. Misguided utterance: This is a very common fact among the women folk and it is so sad that many ladies do not even realize they are guilty of this because they just might believe they are making sense not knowing that they are bruising the man's ego and killing him bit by bit mentally and emotionally. Misguided speech sometimes come in a very subtle way from the lady who may have no clue. For instance a lady footing the bills telling her hubby that "she can not go out all day and still come home to please him sexually" or "he can not satisfy you sexually", or funny words like "you should be thanking GOD for having me cos there are better guys out there" bla bla bla common.... A man is an egocentric person and any word that bruises his ego could bring out the beast in him.
4.Infidelity:This account for many cases of domestic violence leading to death. Yes men cheat as well as ladies but as a lady please be extremely careful when it comes to sexual infidelity. Scientists have proved that the effect of hard drugs on human is the same effect a heart break gives. If you must cheat on your man or hubby please i advice you just break up with such first rather than staying in that affair and cheating because the resultant effect is always a dangerous one.
5.Use of abusive words:This is no doubt one reason why many gentle men have turned wife beaters.There are some women who can use their tongue to set a house on fire and you need to hear how some ladies speak to their spouses.
Many ladies are very erratic in speech and it is not all men that are gentle or can walk away as men are always advised.Please ladies,learn to bridle your tongues to avoid stories that touch...be submissive,be humble.be calm in your speech and avoid getting confrontational because men hate confrontations...remember...not every man is a gentle man so try to always. maintain a status quo.Understand when to keep quiet to avoid heated arguments which usually leads to violent reactions from the man.
6.Gullibility:Yes many ladies are very gullible when it comes to handling domestic violence.There are some guys who just make it a crazy habit beating up a lady at any slight opportunity even if the lady exhibits an angelic nature. If a man beats you once,assume its a mistake but if he tries it again,please don't go back to your parents or waste your time reporting him to family members..go to the police immediately to report him and let him be invited to write an undertaken never to touch you again while you also maintain a proper decorum but if his madness persists,please leave that marriage or relationship immediately whether you have a child for him or not...it is better to remain single and happy than to lose your life.Gullible ladies who have listened to funny advices from family members to remain in a violent marriage for whatever reason are not 6 feet below....Be reasonable.
Hope this makes sense
Lekan Shonde Tells His Own Side Of The Story On The Alleged Killing Of His Wife
The man who allegedly killed his wife and mother of his 2 children, Ronke Shonde in Lagos on Friday, has given his side of the story while in hiding. Lkan Shonde spoke to PUNCH Metro over the phone line provided by his in-law, Bolatito, which was confirmed by the police spokesperson, Dolapo Badmos. Mr. Shonde told Punch correspondent that his wife, Ronke provoked him on Thursday when she described how her lover slept with her in a hotel in Abuja on Thursday night.
Lekan, a depot worker in the Apapa area of Lagos State, said his wife of eight years changed after she allegedly started dating the general manager of a publishing company she worked for.XX He said his late mother had warned him against marrying Ronke but he ignored his mother's warnings and still married Ronke, a decision he regrets.
He said the last time he beat his wife was three years ago after they had a disagreement, adding that he never touched her since then. He narrated...
“Since I married my wife eight years ago, she has never bought anything into the house. I gave her N5,000 on Saturdays and N3,000 on Tuesdays for soup. I also gave her money to make her hair.
“She was working with GTB as a marketer, but she got sacked three years ago. For that period, I was the one feeding her and taking responsibility for everything in the family. I would wash her pants, bathe the children and buy foodstuffs in the house. She later got a job with a publishing company owned by her uncle.
“But my wife changed sometime in March, when she started dating the general manger of a publishing company. My wife was going to the office from Monday to Sunday and she wasn’t going to church again, all because of this man. She called him ‘Eyitemi’ (My own).
“Last week Friday, she went to Abuja and came back on Monday. She never told me that the lover was there with her. I learnt later that the lover was there and they slept together in the same room for four days.
“When she came back, she didn’t know I was inside the house. She started talking with the man on the phone that he really had fun with him and I didn’t know how to make love. She again said her private parts were paining her.”
He said when he confronted his late wife about the affair and she confirmed that she was indeed dating the other man.
He said he got angry and told his late wife to leave the house but she refused to leave.
He said that particular Thursday night, they had an argument over money. He said:
“It was around 9pm on Thursday. We had paid our nanny N20,000. Then we needed to pay our children’s teachers N30,000. I discovered she had taken N20,000 and when I asked her to return my money, she said she had spent it.
“I was angry because for the past three months, she didn’t allow me to have sex with her. I pushed her hand away from me on the staircase and I left her. She never tumbled or fell. In fact that night, I bought the food that we both ate because she said she didn’t want to cook.
“I didn’t know anything had happened to her until Friday when I saw her on the staircase. I thought she was still pretending. I just left her and walked away.”
When he was asked why he locked his children in the house, he denied doing so, adding that it was his son who closed the gate after the he left the house.
Lekan also denied taking his late wife's phone, he said he left it on the bed.
He said he didn't kill his wife and that he had no motive to do so, stating that he had bought her two cars and always provided everything she needed.
He said:
“Jide, her family’s second child lived with me for three to four years. Their eldest daughter, Bolatito, has lived with me too.
“Although I am not a saint, I don’t drink, I don’t smoke. I am a responsible man. The problem with my wife was that she was temperamental. She shouted at me whenever she talked.
“I am a Lagos boy and I can be in this Lagos for the next 30 years and nobody would see me.”
The aunt of the victim, Bunmi, explained that the suspect, Lekan Shonde, has been threatening suicide since this crime took place, but they said they don't want him to do so because their mother has forgiven him.
She said,
“Mummy is very sad with this, but she has forgiven him and does not want him to commit suicide.”
A family source said that Lekan had always accused his late wife of extra-marital affairs and that the suspect had frequently abused her. Adding that the police had been involved on occasion.
He said:
“He always beat her because of his belief that she was into an extra-marital affair.
“The beating reduced a bit when the wife of her late brother who was one month pregnant before his death, moved into the house with them. She stayed for about eight months. She was like her saviour.”
Source: Punch
Lekan, a depot worker in the Apapa area of Lagos State, said his wife of eight years changed after she allegedly started dating the general manager of a publishing company she worked for.XX He said his late mother had warned him against marrying Ronke but he ignored his mother's warnings and still married Ronke, a decision he regrets.
He said the last time he beat his wife was three years ago after they had a disagreement, adding that he never touched her since then. He narrated...
“Since I married my wife eight years ago, she has never bought anything into the house. I gave her N5,000 on Saturdays and N3,000 on Tuesdays for soup. I also gave her money to make her hair.
“She was working with GTB as a marketer, but she got sacked three years ago. For that period, I was the one feeding her and taking responsibility for everything in the family. I would wash her pants, bathe the children and buy foodstuffs in the house. She later got a job with a publishing company owned by her uncle.
“But my wife changed sometime in March, when she started dating the general manger of a publishing company. My wife was going to the office from Monday to Sunday and she wasn’t going to church again, all because of this man. She called him ‘Eyitemi’ (My own).
“Last week Friday, she went to Abuja and came back on Monday. She never told me that the lover was there with her. I learnt later that the lover was there and they slept together in the same room for four days.
“When she came back, she didn’t know I was inside the house. She started talking with the man on the phone that he really had fun with him and I didn’t know how to make love. She again said her private parts were paining her.”
He said when he confronted his late wife about the affair and she confirmed that she was indeed dating the other man.
He said he got angry and told his late wife to leave the house but she refused to leave.
He said that particular Thursday night, they had an argument over money. He said:
“It was around 9pm on Thursday. We had paid our nanny N20,000. Then we needed to pay our children’s teachers N30,000. I discovered she had taken N20,000 and when I asked her to return my money, she said she had spent it.
“I was angry because for the past three months, she didn’t allow me to have sex with her. I pushed her hand away from me on the staircase and I left her. She never tumbled or fell. In fact that night, I bought the food that we both ate because she said she didn’t want to cook.
“I didn’t know anything had happened to her until Friday when I saw her on the staircase. I thought she was still pretending. I just left her and walked away.”
When he was asked why he locked his children in the house, he denied doing so, adding that it was his son who closed the gate after the he left the house.
Lekan also denied taking his late wife's phone, he said he left it on the bed.
He said he didn't kill his wife and that he had no motive to do so, stating that he had bought her two cars and always provided everything she needed.
He said:
“Jide, her family’s second child lived with me for three to four years. Their eldest daughter, Bolatito, has lived with me too.
“Although I am not a saint, I don’t drink, I don’t smoke. I am a responsible man. The problem with my wife was that she was temperamental. She shouted at me whenever she talked.
“I am a Lagos boy and I can be in this Lagos for the next 30 years and nobody would see me.”
The aunt of the victim, Bunmi, explained that the suspect, Lekan Shonde, has been threatening suicide since this crime took place, but they said they don't want him to do so because their mother has forgiven him.
She said,
“Mummy is very sad with this, but she has forgiven him and does not want him to commit suicide.”
A family source said that Lekan had always accused his late wife of extra-marital affairs and that the suspect had frequently abused her. Adding that the police had been involved on occasion.
He said:
“He always beat her because of his belief that she was into an extra-marital affair.
“The beating reduced a bit when the wife of her late brother who was one month pregnant before his death, moved into the house with them. She stayed for about eight months. She was like her saviour.”
Source: Punch
I Am Not A Thief ! Fani Kayode Issued Statement
Femi Fani-Kayode, former aviation minister who is billed to appear before the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission, EFCC today has issued a statement.
Fani-Kayode is expected to explain his role in the $115 million bribe election bribe allegedly dispensed by the immediate past minister of petroleum, Diezani Alison-Madueke.
SEE HIS STATEMENT BELOW:
In view of recent events permit me to begin this weeks column with an aside and say a few things about my present predicament. I shall leave my home and go to the EFCC on the morning of 9th May for questioning about the presidential campaign funds.
I have no fear of this and I look forward to the opportunity of helping the Commission to clarify all the issues that they may wish to raise. No matter the outcome and no matter what they choose to say or do to me, I count it all as joy. I believe that it is only the path of the simple and mediocre that is smooth. The path of the great is filled with challenges and difficulty.
I am therefore not moved or perturbed by what is going on around me or the sheer wickedness and injustice that I am being subjected to. This is moreso because I am a believer in the awesome power of the Living God. I know that no matter how bad things may appear He never forsakes His own.
This is especially so when they have done no wrong. His word says “despite the darkness of the night, joy comes in the morning”. No matter how long it takes that joy will certainly come. Secondly I am not a thief. I served in the Jonathan Presidential Campaign Organisation out of loyalty and not for profit. I worked hard and risked all during that assignment and I believe that we did an effective job. I have no apology for that and the fact that we lost an election does not mean that we should be dehumanised, humiliated, subjected to the most beastly lies or destroyed.
I stand on the word of God who will eventually vindicate me and I have no fear of the evil that my enemies wish to subject me to. The truth is that I am not in their hands or their power but in the hands and power of the Living God. I shall walk the path that He has chosen for me with my head held up high and with faith, strength, honor and dignity knowing that the God that I serve is mighty. In the end my innocence shall speak for me and I shall come out of the burning furnace finer than purified gold.
nigerianbulletin
Fani-Kayode is expected to explain his role in the $115 million bribe election bribe allegedly dispensed by the immediate past minister of petroleum, Diezani Alison-Madueke.
SEE HIS STATEMENT BELOW:
In view of recent events permit me to begin this weeks column with an aside and say a few things about my present predicament. I shall leave my home and go to the EFCC on the morning of 9th May for questioning about the presidential campaign funds.
I have no fear of this and I look forward to the opportunity of helping the Commission to clarify all the issues that they may wish to raise. No matter the outcome and no matter what they choose to say or do to me, I count it all as joy. I believe that it is only the path of the simple and mediocre that is smooth. The path of the great is filled with challenges and difficulty.
I am therefore not moved or perturbed by what is going on around me or the sheer wickedness and injustice that I am being subjected to. This is moreso because I am a believer in the awesome power of the Living God. I know that no matter how bad things may appear He never forsakes His own.
This is especially so when they have done no wrong. His word says “despite the darkness of the night, joy comes in the morning”. No matter how long it takes that joy will certainly come. Secondly I am not a thief. I served in the Jonathan Presidential Campaign Organisation out of loyalty and not for profit. I worked hard and risked all during that assignment and I believe that we did an effective job. I have no apology for that and the fact that we lost an election does not mean that we should be dehumanised, humiliated, subjected to the most beastly lies or destroyed.
I stand on the word of God who will eventually vindicate me and I have no fear of the evil that my enemies wish to subject me to. The truth is that I am not in their hands or their power but in the hands and power of the Living God. I shall walk the path that He has chosen for me with my head held up high and with faith, strength, honor and dignity knowing that the God that I serve is mighty. In the end my innocence shall speak for me and I shall come out of the burning furnace finer than purified gold.
nigerianbulletin
A House Should Be A Safe Haven For Every Woman In Marriage Says Mbong AmataOn Domestic Violence
Actress Mbong Amata has lent her voice on domestic violence following the death of Ronke Shonde who was murdered by her husband Lekan Shonde at their home on Thursday. Read her post below;
Tales about domestic violence is becoming a bit too much for me to handle.😖 What in God's name is going on?!?! Ladies please open your eyes and use your heads! A RELATIONSHIP OR MARRIAGE shouldn't be an ENDURANCE TREK! We've gotta lose this management mentality💁🏼 Domestic abuse goes beyond physical harm...like you know...losing YOUR LIFE! Name calling or putdowns, keeping you from contacting your family or friends, stopping you from getting a job, sexual assault, intimidation are all forms of abuse. "Managing" a relationship or marriage for the sake of your children doesn't provide you a better home, but having an ABUSEFREE home does. #RIP Ronke and Happy Mothers Day to you.💐💐💝💝🙏🏽
#KemiFilani
Tales about domestic violence is becoming a bit too much for me to handle.😖 What in God's name is going on?!?! Ladies please open your eyes and use your heads! A RELATIONSHIP OR MARRIAGE shouldn't be an ENDURANCE TREK! We've gotta lose this management mentality💁🏼 Domestic abuse goes beyond physical harm...like you know...losing YOUR LIFE! Name calling or putdowns, keeping you from contacting your family or friends, stopping you from getting a job, sexual assault, intimidation are all forms of abuse. "Managing" a relationship or marriage for the sake of your children doesn't provide you a better home, but having an ABUSEFREE home does. #RIP Ronke and Happy Mothers Day to you.💐💐💝💝🙏🏽
#KemiFilani
American Kick Off A Game For War Veterans
Prince Harry paid tribute to wounded soldiers for the sacrifices they made as he opened the Invictus Games
•He said he realized how 'privileged' he was to be a prince during his service with the British Army in Afghanistan
•The Prince recalled flying home on a plane with a dead Danish soldier and three seriously injured British servicemen
•The harrowing experience inspired him to set up the Invictus Games to give something back to his 'military family'
•Harry was at the opening ceremony with First Lady Michelle Obama and former President George W Bush
•They and stars including Morgan Freeman and singer James Blunt applauded as the 15 teams walked out
•Veteran Staff Sergeant August O'Neill dropped down from a helicopter to present and hoist up the Invictus flag
•Four-day games celebrates achievements of wounded and disabled veterans and includes 8 sports and track & field
Prince Harry gave an emotional speech about the sacrifices soldiers make on the battlefield and spoke of his own harrowing experiences of war as he opened the Invictus Games in Orlando tonight.
Harry said war had made him realize just how 'privileged' he is to be a prince - and that his service in Afghanistan inspired him to set up the competition to help his 'military family'.
'I learned about the importance of teamwork and camaraderie in a way that only military service can teach you,' Harry said, speaking from his heart.
'And when I traveled back from the battlefield on a plane carrying the body of a Danish soldier and three young Brits fighting for their lives, I began to understand the true cost of war.
Source: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3580216/Let-games-begin-Prince-Harry-Michelle-Obama-host-celebrities-prepare-open-Invictus-Games-Orlando.html
•He said he realized how 'privileged' he was to be a prince during his service with the British Army in Afghanistan
•The Prince recalled flying home on a plane with a dead Danish soldier and three seriously injured British servicemen
•The harrowing experience inspired him to set up the Invictus Games to give something back to his 'military family'
•Harry was at the opening ceremony with First Lady Michelle Obama and former President George W Bush
•They and stars including Morgan Freeman and singer James Blunt applauded as the 15 teams walked out
•Veteran Staff Sergeant August O'Neill dropped down from a helicopter to present and hoist up the Invictus flag
•Four-day games celebrates achievements of wounded and disabled veterans and includes 8 sports and track & field
Prince Harry gave an emotional speech about the sacrifices soldiers make on the battlefield and spoke of his own harrowing experiences of war as he opened the Invictus Games in Orlando tonight.
Harry said war had made him realize just how 'privileged' he is to be a prince - and that his service in Afghanistan inspired him to set up the competition to help his 'military family'.
'I learned about the importance of teamwork and camaraderie in a way that only military service can teach you,' Harry said, speaking from his heart.
'And when I traveled back from the battlefield on a plane carrying the body of a Danish soldier and three young Brits fighting for their lives, I began to understand the true cost of war.
Source: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3580216/Let-games-begin-Prince-Harry-Michelle-Obama-host-celebrities-prepare-open-Invictus-Games-Orlando.html
Sunday 8 May 2016
Lekan Shonde Declared Wanted After He Allegedly Killed His Wife
Ronke Bewaji Shonde, the wife was found dead at their home at Tiemo Crescent off Awori street in Egbeda area of Lagos, and her husband, Lekan Shonde, is missing.
He is believed to have beaten her to death during a domestic dispute and immediately took off...
A family friend who reported the case said Ronke and Lekan had a fight in the early hours of yesterday as their kids were sleeping. One neighbor later said he heard noise coming from their flat early in the morning but didn’t think it was something serious.
Around 7am, the couple’s nanny came to the house to resume work only to find the house locked and no one was opening the door. She tried to call Ronke but her phone was switched off. She peeped through the window only to find the couple’s 6 and 4 year old kids crying and saying they couldn’t wake their mum up.
In an effort to unravelled the mystery behind the killing, Police at SCID has since declare the husband wanted while the deceased body has been deposited at mortuary for autopsy.
Domestic violence is dangerous please people should be careful.
He is believed to have beaten her to death during a domestic dispute and immediately took off...
A family friend who reported the case said Ronke and Lekan had a fight in the early hours of yesterday as their kids were sleeping. One neighbor later said he heard noise coming from their flat early in the morning but didn’t think it was something serious.
Around 7am, the couple’s nanny came to the house to resume work only to find the house locked and no one was opening the door. She tried to call Ronke but her phone was switched off. She peeped through the window only to find the couple’s 6 and 4 year old kids crying and saying they couldn’t wake their mum up.
In an effort to unravelled the mystery behind the killing, Police at SCID has since declare the husband wanted while the deceased body has been deposited at mortuary for autopsy.
Domestic violence is dangerous please people should be careful.
Tiwa Savage's husband tests negative to drugs, source says
According to a source close to Tee Billz he has tested negative to cocaine and other hard drugs. Last week Tiwa Savage claimed that Tee Billz takes cocaine.
Tee Billz, estranged husband and former manager of Pop queen Tiwa Savage, has tested negative to cocaine in a recent drug test, a reliable source close to the talent manager says.
The source also exclusively revealed the drug test to Pulse. Tee Billz also tested negative to other hard drugs, Cannabis, Ecstasy, and Oxycodone.
http://pulse.ng/celebrities/tee-billz-tiwa-savages-husband-tests-negative-to-drugs-source-says-photo-exclusive-id4999265.html?utm_campaign=art-tee-billz-tiwa-savages-husband-tests-negative-to-drugs-source-says-photo-exclusive-2016-05-05&utm_medium=social&utm_source=instagram
Tee Billz, estranged husband and former manager of Pop queen Tiwa Savage, has tested negative to cocaine in a recent drug test, a reliable source close to the talent manager says.
The source also exclusively revealed the drug test to Pulse. Tee Billz also tested negative to other hard drugs, Cannabis, Ecstasy, and Oxycodone.
http://pulse.ng/celebrities/tee-billz-tiwa-savages-husband-tests-negative-to-drugs-source-says-photo-exclusive-id4999265.html?utm_campaign=art-tee-billz-tiwa-savages-husband-tests-negative-to-drugs-source-says-photo-exclusive-2016-05-05&utm_medium=social&utm_source=instagram
'It's not by force to get married or stay married' - Says Waje
As culled from LIB, Singer Waje took to her IG page to react to the story of a young mother of two, Ronke Shonde, who was killed by her husband in Lagos on May 6th. Waje wrote;
"What prompts a man to beat a woman to death? His wife, someone he pledged to care for........ Shame shame shame. It's not by force to get married, stay married, especially when you are with a degenerated monster in human form. Pls open your eyes and know who you are saying yes to ladies and gentlemen. God forbid! Picture perfect can mean #earlyjourneytothegrave #hellonearth#weneedmoreMEN!! Too many old babies with anger issues! Society doesn't care about you so care about yourself!"
"What prompts a man to beat a woman to death? His wife, someone he pledged to care for........ Shame shame shame. It's not by force to get married, stay married, especially when you are with a degenerated monster in human form. Pls open your eyes and know who you are saying yes to ladies and gentlemen. God forbid! Picture perfect can mean #earlyjourneytothegrave #hellonearth#weneedmoreMEN!! Too many old babies with anger issues! Society doesn't care about you so care about yourself!"
Israeli Man Sue God For Not Been Fair To Him In The Last Three Years
An Israeli man has had his suit against God thrown out...but what prompted him to sue his creator in the first place? He claims God has been unfair to him for the last three years and told magistrates in Haifa, northern Israel, that His Holiness had 'exhibited a seriously negative attitude toward him'.
He had even reported the matter to the police but says they didn't take it seriously even though they sent patrol cars to his house.
But the ruling judge Ahsan Canaan threw the application out describing it as 'bizarre' and telling the complainant to get help.
Local media reports him as saying:
'For the past three years He started to treat me harshly and not nicely. I complained to the police many times. The Israel police asked me to take out a restraining order.'
The Haifa resident is said to have represented himself at court, but further details of his feud with the Almighty have not yet emerged.
A Times of Israel report in to the absurd court case said:
'A protocol of the hearing noted that God did not turn up for the session. But it did not specify how the court determined the Omnipresent was not in fact there, as opposed to merely exercising the right to remain silent.'
LIB
He had even reported the matter to the police but says they didn't take it seriously even though they sent patrol cars to his house.
But the ruling judge Ahsan Canaan threw the application out describing it as 'bizarre' and telling the complainant to get help.
Local media reports him as saying:
'For the past three years He started to treat me harshly and not nicely. I complained to the police many times. The Israel police asked me to take out a restraining order.'
The Haifa resident is said to have represented himself at court, but further details of his feud with the Almighty have not yet emerged.
A Times of Israel report in to the absurd court case said:
'A protocol of the hearing noted that God did not turn up for the session. But it did not specify how the court determined the Omnipresent was not in fact there, as opposed to merely exercising the right to remain silent.'
LIB
Deep Crazy Things Women Do To Save Their Marriages
Nonye Ben-Nwankwo and Kunle Falayi
In February 2016, a 43-year-old traditional medicine practitioner, Ahmed Akinlade, was arrested in Akure, Ondo State, after allegedly “turning a mother of two, who approached him for help on her marriage to a sex slave.”
When the victim was interrogated by the police, she had explained that all she did was meant to save her marriage.
“I came to him because he told me he would help me to get my husband back. My marriage is important to me. He said part of the rituals he would do might involve him sleeping with me once. It sounded silly but I have heard from people before that what he does works. That was why I agreed when he told me I needed to sleep with him,” She said.
She is just one of numerous women who go to extreme length to make sure their marriage is intact.
In these days of marriage break-ups, divorce and separation, some Nigerian women, no matter what it takes, wouldn’t want to be caught napping. They would do whatever they feel or think is necessary to keep their marriage from falling apart and to make their husband love them more.
If there is one thing that frightens many married women, it is the prospect of losing their marriages in which they have invested so much emotionally and materially.
These women, irrespective of class, looks, educational background or status, go all out to do crazy things to keep their homes together.
Perhaps the fear of the numerous marriages that break up yearly is the reason women are going extra miles to find a solution when there are indications that their unions may be heading for the rocks.
Saturday PUNCH spoke with some women who shared experiences on what they have had to do to save their marriages.
As extraordinary, weird and downright pathetic as some actions some women take may be, marriages fail every day. A case in point is the marriage break up saga of popular singer, Tiwa Savage and Tajudeen Balogun, AKA Teebillz, a trending topic that has yet to go away. If the fanfare, pomp and ceremony that accompany a wedding ceremony are bulwarks against break ups, the marriage of Tiwa and Teebillz would have lasted two lifetimes.
Marriage “doctors” to the rescue
The demand for intervention on marriage troubles seems to have created a niche market, which some “sharp” Nigerians are taking advantage of.
In many Lagos buses, it is not strange to see pasted little stickers advertising one “Dr. Love” or “Dr. Marriage” who specialises in helping women win their love interests to helping to “heal” their marriages.
In recent times, such “doctors” have taken their market to the social media.
A young woman, who identified herself as Grace based in Port Harcourt, Rivers State, shared her “success story” after her encounter with one of such marriage doctors based in Lokoja, Kogi State.
The woman, who explained that her husband had abandoned her and the children for some years, said one of such doctors worked his ‘magic’ and soon, the runaway husband came back home.
According to her, it only took a spell.
“I contacted and shared my experience with him and he gave me the terms and conditions, which I agreed to. To cut the long story short, I am now living happily ever after with my husband. He also casts spells like lover’s spells, protection spells, business spells and exam spells,” Grace said.
Of course, there was no way Grace’s claims could be verified, but she insisted that the spell gave her back her runaway husband.
Even though some women would not go as far as casting spells to save their marriages, others from one prophet to another seeking help to get back their husbands.
“These days, many people run to one prophet or another for help on marital issues. But when they hear about people using spells for marital problems, they criticise them. I would never use any. But what is the difference between the two? Do you know what some prophets ask such women to do?” Mrs. Bolaji Adebiyi, a business woman, who has been married for 26 years, told Saturday Punch .
One of our correspondents contacted one of such love doctors, through the phone numbers provided on an advertisement bill pasted on a Lagos public bus, promising “rejuvenation of your love life, marriage, business and happiness.”
The enthusiastic man who picked the call, promptly said, “say no more” when he was given a cooked up story about a husband that has become a serial cheat and abuser.
“All you need is a talisman and some magic words. I got training from India. There are so many fake people around defrauding people. But I am happy that you got in touch with me. I don’t want you to send money because that would not be wise since you have not seen me before. You need to meet me personally. I will tell you what you need to do and how you will use the talisman I would be giving you,” he said.
He finally said that the initial cost of the spiritual intervention would be N35,000, which he said should be paid only if the journalist believed in his power. But our reporter never honoured his invitation to the meeting which was supposed to take place in a very remote part of Igando, Lagos.
Baby purchase
In a society where having a baby is seen as the fruit of any marriage, women who have not yet conceived are pushed to seek alternatives without their husbands’ knowledge.
A 34-year-old woman landed in trouble recently when she was connected to a baby sale racket, an issue which is no longer a shock in Nigeria, where many baby making “factories” have been uncovered in the last few years.
Saturday PUNCH learnt that the woman, who is still in police custody in Abia State, was arrested when a stolen baby was traced to her.
She was reported to have told the police that her childlessness and the threat by her husband to send her packing if she failed to have a baby pushed her into looking for a way to buy a baby.
All it required was for her to pretend to be pregnant for as long as she could keep up the deception. The trick was in sustaining the pretence for the period of nine months during which, she said, she ensured that the husband saw her just few times as she was away in her village most of the time.
It is unclear how much she paid for the baby, which she presented to her husband as her new born child only to be arrested six months after her joyful husband celebrated the “birth” of a baby meant to save their marriage.
The story of this woman underlines the desperation that the prospect of marriage crash sometimes forces on women, making them to undertake dangerous ventures that would keep their men down by all means.
But while some are busy buying babies to appease their men who are desperate to become fathers, some women simply try to become a little more creative.
They enrol in gym clubs.
Nothing is as good as keeping one’s husband and improving one’s health at the same time. But while many women go through rigorous workout sessions for their psychological and physical health, many women with weight issues say the idea is to improve their weights and look so good such that their husbands would think twice before philandering.
University of Lagos psychologist, Prof. Oni Fagbohungbe, believes such women may be on the right track but not in all cases.
He said, “Women’s sense of security is very fragile. Whenever they feel their sense of security is threatened, they would do anything to normalise that situation.
Research has confirmed that most women have very strong id, the personality structure, which dominates their behaviour. The id controls the requirements of life and we call it the ‘I-want’ of life.
“This is why when a woman thinks a man is cheating and she may lose her marriage, without waiting for evidence, the id would make her to do everything to retain the husband’s commitment.
“Whether it (going to the gym to look good) works to get the husband back or not, it is the perception of the woman that matters in this situation. It is like a placebo effect. It works in some cases. But if a woman comes out with the wrong diagnosis of such marital problem, it will be curing a problem with the wrong medicine.
“Behaviour is a stimulus response connectivity. If the man sees something better or more attractive out there, he responds by gravitating towards it. Unless the woman understands that thing and incorporate it into her own behavioural repertoire, the man would stay away.”
Cheating back into his arm
When all methods fail to get a philandering husband back, Saturday PUNCH learnt some women actually try to hit back by embarking on a cheating venture of their own.
Whether this would work will always be a controversial issue between both sexes.
Liz Owoyori, who has been married for eight years, shared her story with Saturday PUNCH, She explained, “I have realised that arguing or fighting a cheating husband usually does not work. I would never support that a woman should cheat on her husband to get him back but I realised that some men actually hate to lose.
“There was a time I thought my husband might be cheating. Rather than cheat, what I did was to pretend to also cheat. I started text-chatting late into the night and hiding my phone and messages. I made him conscious of the fact that I was hiding something. I was shocked when I realised that he quickly changed. He became more dedicated. It was obvious he did not want to lose me. Now I understand why some people believe that cheating saves some marriages.”
While society is never usually sympathetic to cheats, some claim it provides clarity and sometimes jolts men back into being committed to their wives.
Prof. Fagbohungbe believes this can also actually work in some cases.
He told our correspondent, “Cheating on a cheating husband can work and it may not work in certain cases. In our culture, a promiscuous man does not attract so much negativity. That is why a man can have a wife and a concubine and society does not frown on it. But when a woman counters negativity with negativity, she sometimes ends up being the one who fails.
“The problem is that we are too shy about discussing issues about our life. In the African setting, even when a woman is not enjoying a sexual contact; she would not talk so that the husband would not feel she is too wild.”
Going under the knife
For those who may not dare to go and visit a prophet or engage the services of a ‘love doctor’, they try to ‘improve’ their looks in order to look more beautiful so that their men wouldn’t have any need to look outside.
Jacinta Emmanuel, a Lagos-based banker told our correspondent she had to get butt implant since she found out her husband favoured women with big backside.
“I didn’t tell him I was going for such surgery. But few years ago, I was in the UK for vacation and I had to do the surgery. I had noticed the way my husband would always drool each time he saw ladies with big bum. I knew if I didn’t do anything about my flat backside, my husband would always cheat on me and I may even lose him. I had to quickly do it.”
Emmanuel who said her husband never found out about the surgery, claims her husband loves her more these days.
“I came back and I started wearing stuff that would enhance my backside. He was thrilled. He eventually asked me what happened and I told him I exercised and I ate good food. He believed me. I used the opportunity to save my marriage. It has been okay since then and he hardly looks at ladies as he used to,” she said.
Ufoma Utebor who works in an oil servicing company also said she had to do cosmetic surgery on her breasts so that her husband would appreciate her more.
“Men are incredible people. If you live with your man, you ought to know what he likes and desires. I got married to my man five years ago and he fantasises and tells me he wished my boobs were bigger. I knew he would likely be going after ladies with big bosom so I had to do something about mine.”
Unlike Emmanuel, Utebor said she asked for permission from her husband before she decided to go for breast implants.
“He told me as long as it wasn’t risky, he wouldn’t mind if I could do anything that would make my breasts bigger. Two years into our marriage when we went for vacation in the US, I had to enlarge my breasts and my husband simply loves it!” she said excitedly
‘What has sustained our marriage’
Even as marriages break up on a daily basis and some other people do strange things to keep theirs intact, some Nigerians say they have been able to sustain their marriage by doing nothing extraordinary.
Mr. Mike Nzeagwu who runs a PR firm in Lagos, has been married to his wife for 20 years and he said his marriage has been filled with wonderful memories.
While admitting it has not always been rosy, Nzeagwu said God in particular, has been able to sustain his home and there hasn’t been any reason for marriage break-up.
“My wife wanted to quit after the first few weeks in the marriage. She couldn’t tell me what the problem was but she kept saying she didn’t bargain for this. I had to keep calming her down again and again. Since then, it has been wonderful.
“What has sustained my marriage is trust in God and trust in ourselves. We trust in each other. My wife is a very strong Christian.
Even though I am a pastor, my wife is still stronger than me. She has been a pillar of support. There have been ups and downs but the ups have been more than the downs. There is openness. If I don’t have money, she gives me hers. She can give me her ATM card to go and withdraw money.
We don’t hide anything from each other. We don’t allow third parties to interfere in our marriage. We have had issues no doubt but we don’t allow anybody to know about our issues.
“I was open to her. We got married on a Saturday and on a Tuesday, I was sent to Kano. We got to the airport and she said she wanted to drink water. You know things are usually expensive at the airport. I had to tell her I wouldn’t buy it. I told her to endure until we got out of the airport so I could buy her water at a reasonable price. From the first day, she knew I was the kind of person that tried to manage his resources very well. I have been open to her; I have never hidden anything from her. I showed her my pay slip, the first time I took her to my house, and there was no furniture. I thought she would change her mind after the first visit but she didn’t. She is not materialistic. She has made sacrifices in her work to take care of the children.”
Nzeagwu said he is usually puzzled when he hears strange stories of what women do to keep their home intact.
“But I don’t blame those women because they may have felt threatened. It is possible they love their husbands, otherwise they would have decided to carry their bags and walk away. The Bible says you shouldn’t go to Egypt for help. If you pray to God, He can protect your marriage. You don’t have to go to a babalawo (herbalist). He might give the woman juju that would make her love the babalawo more than the husband. Leave everything to Jesus the author and finisher of our faith.”
Like Nzeagwu, Mrs. Vivian Anyaegbu who works in a non -governmental organisation in Lagos said she has been married to her husband for 15 years and they have been able to weather the storm all these years.
Giving tips on how she has sustained her marriage, Anyaegbu said, “There is no competition in this institution. There is no first position or second position. If a couple is able to survive the first six years in marriage, then you know it would be difficult for them to break up. Those years are seen as a testing period in marriage. There should be love in a marriage no doubt but what is more important is understanding and trust.
“I don’t think anybody should venture into any diabolical act. Herbalists would always want something in return. Just pray. We need respect in marriage, mutual respect. Everybody is important. If you know your partner is important and you treat the person right, you will be okay.
“I wanted to leave my marriage in the first two years. I packed my bags and said I wasn’t marrying again but then, I didn’t get to the gate. I was planning in my bedroom but I didn’t carry it out. As long as God has destined that man for you, he will always provide happiness at the end. Why would you want to be separated? It is better for you to be there and endure than expose yourselves to several men who will end up messing your life,” she said.
http://www.punchng.com/crazy-things-women-save-marriages/
In February 2016, a 43-year-old traditional medicine practitioner, Ahmed Akinlade, was arrested in Akure, Ondo State, after allegedly “turning a mother of two, who approached him for help on her marriage to a sex slave.”
When the victim was interrogated by the police, she had explained that all she did was meant to save her marriage.
“I came to him because he told me he would help me to get my husband back. My marriage is important to me. He said part of the rituals he would do might involve him sleeping with me once. It sounded silly but I have heard from people before that what he does works. That was why I agreed when he told me I needed to sleep with him,” She said.
She is just one of numerous women who go to extreme length to make sure their marriage is intact.
In these days of marriage break-ups, divorce and separation, some Nigerian women, no matter what it takes, wouldn’t want to be caught napping. They would do whatever they feel or think is necessary to keep their marriage from falling apart and to make their husband love them more.
If there is one thing that frightens many married women, it is the prospect of losing their marriages in which they have invested so much emotionally and materially.
These women, irrespective of class, looks, educational background or status, go all out to do crazy things to keep their homes together.
Perhaps the fear of the numerous marriages that break up yearly is the reason women are going extra miles to find a solution when there are indications that their unions may be heading for the rocks.
Saturday PUNCH spoke with some women who shared experiences on what they have had to do to save their marriages.
As extraordinary, weird and downright pathetic as some actions some women take may be, marriages fail every day. A case in point is the marriage break up saga of popular singer, Tiwa Savage and Tajudeen Balogun, AKA Teebillz, a trending topic that has yet to go away. If the fanfare, pomp and ceremony that accompany a wedding ceremony are bulwarks against break ups, the marriage of Tiwa and Teebillz would have lasted two lifetimes.
Marriage “doctors” to the rescue
The demand for intervention on marriage troubles seems to have created a niche market, which some “sharp” Nigerians are taking advantage of.
In many Lagos buses, it is not strange to see pasted little stickers advertising one “Dr. Love” or “Dr. Marriage” who specialises in helping women win their love interests to helping to “heal” their marriages.
In recent times, such “doctors” have taken their market to the social media.
A young woman, who identified herself as Grace based in Port Harcourt, Rivers State, shared her “success story” after her encounter with one of such marriage doctors based in Lokoja, Kogi State.
The woman, who explained that her husband had abandoned her and the children for some years, said one of such doctors worked his ‘magic’ and soon, the runaway husband came back home.
According to her, it only took a spell.
“I contacted and shared my experience with him and he gave me the terms and conditions, which I agreed to. To cut the long story short, I am now living happily ever after with my husband. He also casts spells like lover’s spells, protection spells, business spells and exam spells,” Grace said.
Of course, there was no way Grace’s claims could be verified, but she insisted that the spell gave her back her runaway husband.
Even though some women would not go as far as casting spells to save their marriages, others from one prophet to another seeking help to get back their husbands.
“These days, many people run to one prophet or another for help on marital issues. But when they hear about people using spells for marital problems, they criticise them. I would never use any. But what is the difference between the two? Do you know what some prophets ask such women to do?” Mrs. Bolaji Adebiyi, a business woman, who has been married for 26 years, told Saturday Punch .
One of our correspondents contacted one of such love doctors, through the phone numbers provided on an advertisement bill pasted on a Lagos public bus, promising “rejuvenation of your love life, marriage, business and happiness.”
The enthusiastic man who picked the call, promptly said, “say no more” when he was given a cooked up story about a husband that has become a serial cheat and abuser.
“All you need is a talisman and some magic words. I got training from India. There are so many fake people around defrauding people. But I am happy that you got in touch with me. I don’t want you to send money because that would not be wise since you have not seen me before. You need to meet me personally. I will tell you what you need to do and how you will use the talisman I would be giving you,” he said.
He finally said that the initial cost of the spiritual intervention would be N35,000, which he said should be paid only if the journalist believed in his power. But our reporter never honoured his invitation to the meeting which was supposed to take place in a very remote part of Igando, Lagos.
Baby purchase
In a society where having a baby is seen as the fruit of any marriage, women who have not yet conceived are pushed to seek alternatives without their husbands’ knowledge.
A 34-year-old woman landed in trouble recently when she was connected to a baby sale racket, an issue which is no longer a shock in Nigeria, where many baby making “factories” have been uncovered in the last few years.
Saturday PUNCH learnt that the woman, who is still in police custody in Abia State, was arrested when a stolen baby was traced to her.
She was reported to have told the police that her childlessness and the threat by her husband to send her packing if she failed to have a baby pushed her into looking for a way to buy a baby.
All it required was for her to pretend to be pregnant for as long as she could keep up the deception. The trick was in sustaining the pretence for the period of nine months during which, she said, she ensured that the husband saw her just few times as she was away in her village most of the time.
It is unclear how much she paid for the baby, which she presented to her husband as her new born child only to be arrested six months after her joyful husband celebrated the “birth” of a baby meant to save their marriage.
The story of this woman underlines the desperation that the prospect of marriage crash sometimes forces on women, making them to undertake dangerous ventures that would keep their men down by all means.
But while some are busy buying babies to appease their men who are desperate to become fathers, some women simply try to become a little more creative.
They enrol in gym clubs.
Nothing is as good as keeping one’s husband and improving one’s health at the same time. But while many women go through rigorous workout sessions for their psychological and physical health, many women with weight issues say the idea is to improve their weights and look so good such that their husbands would think twice before philandering.
University of Lagos psychologist, Prof. Oni Fagbohungbe, believes such women may be on the right track but not in all cases.
He said, “Women’s sense of security is very fragile. Whenever they feel their sense of security is threatened, they would do anything to normalise that situation.
Research has confirmed that most women have very strong id, the personality structure, which dominates their behaviour. The id controls the requirements of life and we call it the ‘I-want’ of life.
“This is why when a woman thinks a man is cheating and she may lose her marriage, without waiting for evidence, the id would make her to do everything to retain the husband’s commitment.
“Whether it (going to the gym to look good) works to get the husband back or not, it is the perception of the woman that matters in this situation. It is like a placebo effect. It works in some cases. But if a woman comes out with the wrong diagnosis of such marital problem, it will be curing a problem with the wrong medicine.
“Behaviour is a stimulus response connectivity. If the man sees something better or more attractive out there, he responds by gravitating towards it. Unless the woman understands that thing and incorporate it into her own behavioural repertoire, the man would stay away.”
Cheating back into his arm
When all methods fail to get a philandering husband back, Saturday PUNCH learnt some women actually try to hit back by embarking on a cheating venture of their own.
Whether this would work will always be a controversial issue between both sexes.
Liz Owoyori, who has been married for eight years, shared her story with Saturday PUNCH, She explained, “I have realised that arguing or fighting a cheating husband usually does not work. I would never support that a woman should cheat on her husband to get him back but I realised that some men actually hate to lose.
“There was a time I thought my husband might be cheating. Rather than cheat, what I did was to pretend to also cheat. I started text-chatting late into the night and hiding my phone and messages. I made him conscious of the fact that I was hiding something. I was shocked when I realised that he quickly changed. He became more dedicated. It was obvious he did not want to lose me. Now I understand why some people believe that cheating saves some marriages.”
While society is never usually sympathetic to cheats, some claim it provides clarity and sometimes jolts men back into being committed to their wives.
Prof. Fagbohungbe believes this can also actually work in some cases.
He told our correspondent, “Cheating on a cheating husband can work and it may not work in certain cases. In our culture, a promiscuous man does not attract so much negativity. That is why a man can have a wife and a concubine and society does not frown on it. But when a woman counters negativity with negativity, she sometimes ends up being the one who fails.
“The problem is that we are too shy about discussing issues about our life. In the African setting, even when a woman is not enjoying a sexual contact; she would not talk so that the husband would not feel she is too wild.”
Going under the knife
For those who may not dare to go and visit a prophet or engage the services of a ‘love doctor’, they try to ‘improve’ their looks in order to look more beautiful so that their men wouldn’t have any need to look outside.
Jacinta Emmanuel, a Lagos-based banker told our correspondent she had to get butt implant since she found out her husband favoured women with big backside.
“I didn’t tell him I was going for such surgery. But few years ago, I was in the UK for vacation and I had to do the surgery. I had noticed the way my husband would always drool each time he saw ladies with big bum. I knew if I didn’t do anything about my flat backside, my husband would always cheat on me and I may even lose him. I had to quickly do it.”
Emmanuel who said her husband never found out about the surgery, claims her husband loves her more these days.
“I came back and I started wearing stuff that would enhance my backside. He was thrilled. He eventually asked me what happened and I told him I exercised and I ate good food. He believed me. I used the opportunity to save my marriage. It has been okay since then and he hardly looks at ladies as he used to,” she said.
Ufoma Utebor who works in an oil servicing company also said she had to do cosmetic surgery on her breasts so that her husband would appreciate her more.
“Men are incredible people. If you live with your man, you ought to know what he likes and desires. I got married to my man five years ago and he fantasises and tells me he wished my boobs were bigger. I knew he would likely be going after ladies with big bosom so I had to do something about mine.”
Unlike Emmanuel, Utebor said she asked for permission from her husband before she decided to go for breast implants.
“He told me as long as it wasn’t risky, he wouldn’t mind if I could do anything that would make my breasts bigger. Two years into our marriage when we went for vacation in the US, I had to enlarge my breasts and my husband simply loves it!” she said excitedly
‘What has sustained our marriage’
Even as marriages break up on a daily basis and some other people do strange things to keep theirs intact, some Nigerians say they have been able to sustain their marriage by doing nothing extraordinary.
Mr. Mike Nzeagwu who runs a PR firm in Lagos, has been married to his wife for 20 years and he said his marriage has been filled with wonderful memories.
While admitting it has not always been rosy, Nzeagwu said God in particular, has been able to sustain his home and there hasn’t been any reason for marriage break-up.
“My wife wanted to quit after the first few weeks in the marriage. She couldn’t tell me what the problem was but she kept saying she didn’t bargain for this. I had to keep calming her down again and again. Since then, it has been wonderful.
“What has sustained my marriage is trust in God and trust in ourselves. We trust in each other. My wife is a very strong Christian.
Even though I am a pastor, my wife is still stronger than me. She has been a pillar of support. There have been ups and downs but the ups have been more than the downs. There is openness. If I don’t have money, she gives me hers. She can give me her ATM card to go and withdraw money.
We don’t hide anything from each other. We don’t allow third parties to interfere in our marriage. We have had issues no doubt but we don’t allow anybody to know about our issues.
“I was open to her. We got married on a Saturday and on a Tuesday, I was sent to Kano. We got to the airport and she said she wanted to drink water. You know things are usually expensive at the airport. I had to tell her I wouldn’t buy it. I told her to endure until we got out of the airport so I could buy her water at a reasonable price. From the first day, she knew I was the kind of person that tried to manage his resources very well. I have been open to her; I have never hidden anything from her. I showed her my pay slip, the first time I took her to my house, and there was no furniture. I thought she would change her mind after the first visit but she didn’t. She is not materialistic. She has made sacrifices in her work to take care of the children.”
Nzeagwu said he is usually puzzled when he hears strange stories of what women do to keep their home intact.
“But I don’t blame those women because they may have felt threatened. It is possible they love their husbands, otherwise they would have decided to carry their bags and walk away. The Bible says you shouldn’t go to Egypt for help. If you pray to God, He can protect your marriage. You don’t have to go to a babalawo (herbalist). He might give the woman juju that would make her love the babalawo more than the husband. Leave everything to Jesus the author and finisher of our faith.”
Like Nzeagwu, Mrs. Vivian Anyaegbu who works in a non -governmental organisation in Lagos said she has been married to her husband for 15 years and they have been able to weather the storm all these years.
Giving tips on how she has sustained her marriage, Anyaegbu said, “There is no competition in this institution. There is no first position or second position. If a couple is able to survive the first six years in marriage, then you know it would be difficult for them to break up. Those years are seen as a testing period in marriage. There should be love in a marriage no doubt but what is more important is understanding and trust.
“I don’t think anybody should venture into any diabolical act. Herbalists would always want something in return. Just pray. We need respect in marriage, mutual respect. Everybody is important. If you know your partner is important and you treat the person right, you will be okay.
“I wanted to leave my marriage in the first two years. I packed my bags and said I wasn’t marrying again but then, I didn’t get to the gate. I was planning in my bedroom but I didn’t carry it out. As long as God has destined that man for you, he will always provide happiness at the end. Why would you want to be separated? It is better for you to be there and endure than expose yourselves to several men who will end up messing your life,” she said.
http://www.punchng.com/crazy-things-women-save-marriages/
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